Annoying things

It is May and it is cold outside.  Furthermore, our boiler has broken down (again!).  I am sitting next to the gas fire place wearing multiple sweaters and socks, trying to keep warm (in May!).  This is annoying.  Unfortunately, this has led me to ponder some of the many things which I find annoying.  So, in direct opposition to my normally pleasant and optimistic blog posts, I am going to write about annoying things.  Go ahead – call me grumpy!

Knitting-related annoying things:

  • Rolled edges – I know these are all the rage lately, but I don’t like them.  They don’t look neat.  They roll up.  You put a lot of work into your garment and it looks unfinished.
  • Triangular shawls – I know these are seriously all the rage these days.  And there are many of them that are gorgeous.  I love to see them.  But I can’t wear them.  They look dumb on me. They fall off.  They hang funny.   Though many people wear them with amazing panache, they frequently look dumb on other people too.  (OK, there goes half my readership.)
  • Mystery KALs –  I want to know what I am knitting.  Enough said.
  • Colour pooling – No matter how much I love those variegated yarns on the skein, I tend to fall out of love with them when they are knitted up.
  • Shapeless cardigans – Why are these so popular right now?
  • People who don’t measure themselves and then blame the designer when the sweater doesn’t fit- Do you think that people come in standard sizes?  Does the designer come and personally measure you?

Book-related annoying things:

  • Bad editing – I hate this above all else.
  • Billionaires – As soon as I see the word “billionaire” on the jacket copy you’ve lost me (it used to be “millionaire”, but, you know, inflation….) While I’m on the topic, I also hate serial killers, motorcycle clubs, rock stars, hockey players, tattoo artists, and generally, anyone under 25 (OK, now I’m just being mean!).
  • Any book with a pink cover.
  • Self-help books – Why do they all have numbers?  Ten things that will make you happy.  Three ways to get rich.  Seven rules for making friends.  Does counting make us happier?  (I am a knitter; believe me, it doesn’t.)
  • Diet books – All of them.
  • Bad editing – This is so annoying, that I’m listing it twice.

Generally annoying things:

  • Pseudo-science –  Just because.
  • Reality TV –  What is the point?  Really; I don’t get it.
  • Being questioned about American politics – Do you have any idea what it’s like to be an American in Europe right now?  US politics are such a train wreck at the moment, everyone wants to ask you about it.  As soon as I open my mouth, people discern my accent and line up to ask “WTF?”
  • Flavoured coffee – OK, so I’m being curmudgeonly here.
  • Celebrities – Huh?

I’m going to pour myself a glass of wine and knit now.   The next time you hear from me, I will be my normal cheerful self.

19 thoughts on “Annoying things

  1. Wow! We might be related! I too hate all of the knitting things you mentioned – especially sweaters with no shaping. I have a small waist and big hips. If I don’t have waist shaping, I look like a big box. : )

    I made myself a lovely triangle shawl and can’t figure out how to get it to look good when I wear it. I just feel stupid.

    And despite the pooling of variegated yarn, I just bought more in a cotton – why??? Because I liked the colors. I will say my best success with that is using it to crochet something that is very open/lacy. No plan for the cotton yet.

    Glad to hear I’m not the only one! So have you decided on a new project yet?

  2. You’ve copied my list of pet peeves exactly. I am so shawled-out I can’t look at them any more.
    You left one thing off of my list: men wearing baseball caps indoors and worse still, wearing them backwards.
    Things will be better tomorrow and perhaps sooner if your wine doesn’t have too high a sugar content. Enjoy!

  3. I don’t understand the whole idea of a triangular shawl, not enough coverage in the winter, too hot in the summer, I’ve always thought they must be easy and quick….can’t think of another reason. I really enjoyed your list, found myself nodding in agreement or simply smiling. Thank you for letting us know those who might be grumpy occasionally are not alone:)

  4. I wish so many sweaters weren’t being designed as seamless, as I think seams add a great deal of structural integrity to a garment. Maybe if one is tiny, the sweater will be light enough that it can hold its shape without seams, but that is not the case when one gets to size large.

    On the book front, I really dislike when authors tell the reader what the character is feeling rather than show the feeling through what the character does and says. I also think the value of a content editor is sorely underrated today. For example, I generally don’t need to know every single thing a character eats throughout the two week time frame of a novel, but I read a mystery where that was the case. The character ate a lot of fast food and drank a lot of coffee.

    As for generally annoying, treating the skill of punctuality as an abnormal freak or nature, or even worse, assuming that the punctual person doesn’t have anything else to do, so being punctual was easy.

  5. Brilliant! I especially liked the Mystery KAL comment! The whole thing cheered me up and made me smile!

  6. And I thought I was the only one who has had an exceedingly grumpy couple of weeks!

    I get every one of your hates and find them so true and hilarious – Well except rolled hems, I quite like them! X x

  7. You’re allowed to be grumpy (not all the time though). I just said earlier today- I wish I was complaining about the heat- not the cold in May. It’s cold and rainy this whole week.

  8. I am currently knitting a triangular shawl with Brooklyn Tweed’s Loft, and while it’s a fun knit (and I can do it easily with the limited quantity of yarn I have, I’ve been second guessing myself the whole time. It is a gift, so there’s the debate about continuing or not.

    You neglected other pet peeves. Pattern designers, please number your pages, and include the pattern name. It doesn’t take much to add the footer, and while you are at it, add a revision date. Some of us still print paper patterns.

    Cookbook authors, is it too much to ask for a decent index? And please don’t split the ingredient list between pages, although this is more forgivable if the pages are facing each other.

    Oh, and my name is Susan. Had my mother intended me to be called Sue, she’d have named me Sue, and I certainly wouldn’t have introduced myself as Susan.

  9. Absolutely!!! and the same to most of the commenters as well 🙂 :0 Why not knit sweaters in parts and so make a much more portable project 🙂 and to add to the cookbook comments – those authors who name their recipes e.g. dangerous chocolate cake and then index it under ‘D”!!

  10. I think you and the commenters hit almost all of the things that drive me crazy, with a few exceptions, some of which I actually have posted about. Poor grammar in the media (maybe that goes along with bad editing?) What has happened to the adverb? Have “l” and “y” been removed from the alphabet?

    Tourist drives who are so enchanted with the scenery that they forget to drive anywhere near the speed limit. Hello! All those people lined up behind you live here and are trying to get to work. Move over or speed up.

    As for triangle shawls, I knit’em, wear’em, gift’em, and sell ’em. Maybe I look dumb in them, but they are wonderfully warm wrapped around my shoulders and neck (my office is drafty) and they are fun to knit, and great pops of color in my otherwise drab navy/gray/black wardrobe. But I am OK with you not liking them. Makes life more interesting. 🙂

  11. The weather is getting everyone down. It is cold and rainy and tomorrow I am planting spartina alterniflora IN TIDAL WATER. I will send you MY list tomorrow! 🙂 Hang in there Kelly, everyone seems to be in a funk right now. Mercury is retrograde, but that is one of the things that annoy you! LOL! 😉

  12. Amen, sister! Especially on the book-related peeves. I also hate the way Amazon/publishers have taken to adding a little summary phrase to a book title, so it will be “The Teacher: a chilling thriller for fans of…” (I made this one up, but they are all over the Amazon top 10). I will decide whether I want to read a book or not, thank you. I don’t need a little promo included in the title. Argh!

  13. Kelly, I’ve been reading you for ages, and never so compelled to comment as this time: Spot on!!! ALL of them! ( and very, very funny too 😀 ) I’m also an American expat who hasn’t lived in the States for 27 years, so why do people think I can shed any light on the craziness that’s going on over there right now? I am thinking of hiring a dialogue coach to help me change my accent 😉

  14. Absolutely! I hear you, I’ve also been on a grumpy rampage lately. Tourist season is nearly here and I hate it. The hog the grocery stores and empty the shelves. I really hate when people leave doors open everywhere, chairs never pushed in and so much more. As for yarn/knitting you hit all my main complaints too. It really feels good to vent. Let it go! Let it go! (LOL another annoying thing that song) Have a great day!

  15. You had me laughing out loud! Yes, yes and yes again to so many of your/our “issues”.

    I have knit exactly ONE triangular scarf and it has to be one of my favorites. The fact it’s made of Kidsilk might have something to do with it, but I do find it to be quite versatile and easy to wear. Now those small handkerchief-sized triangular scarves…well…don’t get me started.

    This past week in Canada has been marked by terrible fires in Alberta which have displaced over 90K people and destroyed 2000 square kilometres and counting. Suddenly these pet peeves seem so trivial in comparison to being forced to evacuate your home in 15 minutes, or worse, being at work and unable to return home in time to save your most prized possessions. I’ve given much consideration this past week to what I’d take and what I’d toss, if push came to shove. The stash can burn, but my FO’s, they’re coming! (The fact I leave many in the car will now be considered planning and not disorganized laziness!)

    Well, that downer aside, we all have days (weeks?) where things appear to conspire against us, however, we’re quite lucky considering the alternative. Hope your cloud has diminished and that warmer weather will soon be upon us!

    Knit on, Kelly, knit on…

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